If you want to be confident, you can’t try to be confident. This will only result in overconfidence. If you want to be confident, what you must do is not try to do anything, but just be in the world. Just go with the flow of the universe. Follow where things take you, while also directing things yourself, but not too much with the conscious brain. Let the unconscious brain shoulder most of the hard work. And above all, assume that everything is OK, and assume that you are OK. Only then will you be confident.
I discovered this truth about a decade ago. This year, I have discovered a corollary. If you want to be calm—another way of putting this is, if you want to eschew anxiety—you can’t try to be calm. This will only result in tension. If you want to be calm, what you must do is not try to do anything, but just be in the world. Just go with the flow of the universe. Follow where things take you, while also directing things yourself, but not too much with the conscious brain. Let the unconscious brain shoulder most of the hard work. And above all, assume that everything is OK, and assume that you are OK. Only then will you be calm.
My ex-husband used to say, “Don’t try. Do.” I assume he got this from Yoda, always a superior spiritual teacher.
