But just as often, I am able to identify primary causes of anxiety that are more substantial. The feeling of pressure is not always caused by a relatively simple matter like trying to decide which mobile phone to get (as I wrote about in the first part of this two-part blog article). After all, my mobile phone dilemma is a...
As a person who suffers from anxiety, I understand the feeling of pressure. It hovers in the background of my days and dreams. Sometimes I’m aware of its presence; often I’m not. Often it’s just this invisible thing propelling me forward, or rather, away from the agony of the pressure, which doesn’t necessarily lead to anyplace that can be called...
Big things are happening over here! Concussion or no concussion! Mental health struggles or no mental health struggles! Arm issues or no arm issues! Don’t care—I’m making it happen. Look at your favorite timepiece, of ancient or modern technological style. Mine says it’s Wednesday, May 20, 2020, around 8ish a.m., Eastern Time, in the Common Era. And then wait around,...
I can’t catch a break. What is going on? Every few days or so, I get myself tangled up in another incident. I used to think one of my brothers was accident prone. Now I know: I must’ve inherited the same family trait. Two days ago, I was trimming bushes in my yard. I was being VERY careful as regards...
Oren Jay Sofer, an expert in mindful communication, tells the following story in his book Say What You Mean. It’s a true story about a friend of his who displayed mindful perseverance in connecting with a stranger: “One afternoon in Boston, he met an attractive young woman while waiting at a crosswalk. They had a short but warm connection, and...
I’ve been doing a serious investigation, during the past week, into this important question: Why the heck can’t I drive? Before my concussion setback, which was more than 2.5 months ago, I was able to drive to the drugstore and back. But after months of trying to get that back, I’m only able to drive down the nearby cul-de-sac and...
What works in healing anxiety? Mine and others’? This is the topic I promised to write about in my recent blog post Managing My Anxiety During a Time of Mass Anxiety. What Cures Anxiety for Me Is Generating the Feeling That Someone Cares About Me Feeling that someone gives a shit about me is really important to my health and...
I’ve been battling my old anxiety demons continuously since my concussion setback. That was seven weeks ago. The concussion symptoms themselves were sorta kinda back to okay within two weeks, though some of the symptoms persisted a few weeks longer. But the anxiety and panic ballooned and ballooned until they once again started afflicting me with physical symptoms that prevented...
The most recent issue of Washingtonian magazine includes an article called “The Lady’s Handbook for Her Mysterious Illness,” by Sarah Ramey. The article is an excerpt from her memoir (which will be released next month, and has the same title) about her persistent, unexplained health troubles. In the article, Ramey explains that she used to feel that she was the...
Yesterday I tried acupuncture for the first time. This morning I feel more relaxed than I have all week. Thanks to J.D.M. for repeatedly recommending the acupuncturist to me, and thanks to D.H. for being absolutely relentless in expounding on the virtues of acupuncture and other aspects of Eastern medicine. My health is still at a low point, but for...
LOCATION: Washington, DC The inquisitive one was working on an important project. But technical difficulties kept arising: one after the next, after the next. The inquisitive one was making hardly any progress on the important project. All the time was sapped up in solving technical problems! “Aargh!” cried the inquisitive one, for the 129th time . . . just as...
One A tall, paunchy man stood next to the wall. No one could see him, except for me. I was afraid of him. I tried to stuff him into a large trunk and close the lid. The lid would not completely close. I was afraid, knowing he would emerge again. Later, I was in a bedroom packed with people. The...
Thank you for the flowers. I am feeling better than I was two days ago, so that’s progress. Today I’d like to share an article I enjoyed from a recent issue of The New Yorker. The author of the article, Cyrus Grace Dunham, describes their ongoing transition from living as a woman (named Grace) to living as a man (named...
Meditation really does work. It really is a game changer. The things you see and read in the news about mindfulness are not all hype. I titled this post Meditation 101 because I’d like to share some insights that get to the foundation of the practice. These insights are important for beginners to understand, and nonbeginners can benefit from reminders...
Scenarios 1. One day my loved one announced a new household order. I am no longer allowed to drive, talk to anyone except my loved one, seek medical care, spend money without permission, or use electricity. I am only permitted to wear traditional clothing; I am only permitted to read books approved by my loved one. This feels restrictive and...
The inquisitive one traveled to London. It was going to be an exciting adventure! While in a crowded street market, the inquisitive one saw some postcards. “I could send these to my nephew and niece!” thought the inquisitive one, as a bunch of people jostled into the back, shoulders, and butt. When the inquisitive one went to pay for the...
Hello, fellow residents of our beautiful planet! I am writing this blog post from a cute Danish cafe in London. Here is a photo I took from my seat in the cafe. If you know me at least a bit, and if you look closely at the photo, you may be able to guess my favorite part of it. However,...
What do we pay doctors to do? Use medical instruments to collect data? Record that data in our charts? Perform procedures? Prescribe medications? Give referrals to other medical specialists? Recommend home care remedies and strategies? Have I forgotten anything? The author of a new memoir would say YES! Kurt Eichenwald has written an astounding memoir, published last year, about his...
One of the great things about the book The Body Keeps the Score, by Bessel van der Kolk, M.D., is that it is written for laypeople and practitioners alike. No matter whether you’re the one lying on the couch, so to speak, or the one with the credentials, the book contains massive amounts of research-based insights. One point that Dr....
I was stumped by yet another medical mystery. A prescription drug that helps me immensely also makes me tired. I have trouble waking up. I feel fairly alert in the morning, but I ache to nap all afternoon. And forget the evening—I’m ready for bed immediately after dinner. My doctor has been helping me experiment with different remedies for this...
Speaking of confidence—it’s something that’s very difficult to project in social situations, no matter what color your dress is. Possessing the rare talent of confidence is like possessing a bag of scratch in a yard full of free-range chickens. It’s guaranteed to make everyone come running, or at least look up at you with curiosity and interest. Let me tell...
I In a play I saw recently, the heroine first appears onstage wearing a red dress . . . with her head bowed and turned away, due to social anxiety. The contrast is striking. There’s something about a red dress that shouts, “Look at me!” To see one on a young woman who so plainly wants to be invisible is...
If you are a writer, you are probably familiar with Anne Lamott, as she is a hero among writers. If you are not familiar with Anne Lamott, let me introduce her to you. She has a gift for homing in on the nuances of spirituality, anxiety, love, and other topics of great pertinence to our interior selves. Among writers, she...
If, on the other hand, you felt more inclined to travel by motorcycle four days ago—this post is for you. Bruce Springsteen’s song “Born to Run” definitely isn’t about strapping on your running shoes—the thought makes me bust out laughing! No—it’s about “suicide machines,” and the narrator is “a scared and lonely rider,” who’s thinking, “we gotta get out while...
Earlier in the chapter I quoted in my previous blog post, the protagonist says something that I found fascinating, sad, and immediately recognizable: “I don’t let my thoughts touch the sides as I take the crowbar out of the toolbox . . .” “I don’t let my thoughts touch the sides”: I get that; I have felt that way before....
Hi, all! Today I’d like to provide a few updates, some pertaining to this website and others pertaining to topics of previous blog posts. Security This website runs over https. The “s” means that communications to and from the website are secure and encrypted. The site gets an A+ rating by the SSL Server Test (woo-hoo!). The security of this...
If you’re a nature lover like me, you’ve probably encountered the following paradox. When the rush of modern life gets overwhelming, when the crush of people, busy and striving, feels oppressive, it’s wonderful to seek out the hush of nature. Traipsing through the woods is cathartic. One feels peaceful and at one with the universe . . . until a...
This is a photo of me meditating. My usual place of meditation is on a prayer mat on a picturesque wooden balcony in Bali. Just kidding. That’s not me—though the photo really is of a woman doing yoga in Bali. In reality, I sometimes meditate in an awkward cross-legged position on my rumpled bed, in the dark in the suburbs...
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Upheaval Jared Diamond
A Journal of the Plague Year Daniel Defoe
Creatures Crissy Van Meter
Indelicacy Amina Cain
Say What You Mean Oren Jay Sofer
Habits of a Happy Brain Loretta Graziano Breuning
Bad Behavior, This Is Pleasure Mary Gaitskill
The Brother Gardeners Andrea Wulf
Severance Ling Ma
How to Be an Antiracist Ibram X. Kendi
The Museum of Modern Love Heather Rose
Why I Write George Orwell
The Woman Destroyed Simone de Beauvoir
Educated Tara Westover
The Gift Hafiz
The Collected Schizophrenias Esmé Weijun Wang
Your Duck Is My Duck Deborah Eisenberg
Sapiens Yuval Noah Harari
Milkman Anna Burns
Under the Banner of Heaven Jon Krakauer
Waiting for Bojangles Olivier Bourdeaut
A Mind Unraveled Kurt Eichenwald
Eugénie Grandet Honoré de Balzac
The Body Keeps the Score Bessel van der Kolk, M.D.
The Bookshop Penelope Fitzgerald
Digital Minimalism Cal Newport
The Sisters Brothers Patrick deWitt
Dare to Lead Brené Brown
My Year of Rest and Relaxation Ottessa Moshfegh
Almost Everything Anne Lamott
Born to Run Christopher McDougall, Bruce Springsteen
The Ladies’ Paradise Émile Zola
The World Beyond Your Head Matthew B. Crawford
All the Birds, Singing Evie Wyld
Barracoon Zora Neale Hurston
Dandelion Wine Ray Bradbury
JavaScript & jQuery Jon Duckett
Home Fire Kamila Shamsie
The Weather Detective Peter Wohlleben
Play It As It Lays Joan Didion
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck Mark Manson
Convenience Store Woman Sayaka Murata
Perfect Me Heather Widdows
Sorry to Disrupt the Peace Patty Yumi Cottrell
Why Buddhism Is True Robert Wright
What Is Real? Adam Becker
Kudos Rachel Cusk
The Days of Abandonment Elena Ferrante
F*cked Corinne Fisher & Krystyna Hutchinson
Searching for Stars on an Island in Maine Alan Lightman
Wide Sargasso Sea Jean Rhys
Infinite Jest David Foster Wallace
A Room of One’s Own Virginia Woolf
A Journal of the Plague Year Daniel Defoe
Creatures Crissy Van Meter
Indelicacy Amina Cain
Say What You Mean Oren Jay Sofer
Habits of a Happy Brain Loretta Graziano Breuning
Bad Behavior, This Is Pleasure Mary Gaitskill
The Brother Gardeners Andrea Wulf
Severance Ling Ma
How to Be an Antiracist Ibram X. Kendi
The Museum of Modern Love Heather Rose
Why I Write George Orwell
The Woman Destroyed Simone de Beauvoir
Educated Tara Westover
The Gift Hafiz
The Collected Schizophrenias Esmé Weijun Wang
Your Duck Is My Duck Deborah Eisenberg
Sapiens Yuval Noah Harari
Milkman Anna Burns
Under the Banner of Heaven Jon Krakauer
Waiting for Bojangles Olivier Bourdeaut
A Mind Unraveled Kurt Eichenwald
Eugénie Grandet Honoré de Balzac
The Body Keeps the Score Bessel van der Kolk, M.D.
The Bookshop Penelope Fitzgerald
Digital Minimalism Cal Newport
The Sisters Brothers Patrick deWitt
Dare to Lead Brené Brown
My Year of Rest and Relaxation Ottessa Moshfegh
Almost Everything Anne Lamott
Born to Run Christopher McDougall, Bruce Springsteen
The Ladies’ Paradise Émile Zola
The World Beyond Your Head Matthew B. Crawford
All the Birds, Singing Evie Wyld
Barracoon Zora Neale Hurston
Dandelion Wine Ray Bradbury
JavaScript & jQuery Jon Duckett
Home Fire Kamila Shamsie
The Weather Detective Peter Wohlleben
Play It As It Lays Joan Didion
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck Mark Manson
Convenience Store Woman Sayaka Murata
Perfect Me Heather Widdows
Sorry to Disrupt the Peace Patty Yumi Cottrell
Why Buddhism Is True Robert Wright
What Is Real? Adam Becker
Kudos Rachel Cusk
The Days of Abandonment Elena Ferrante
F*cked Corinne Fisher & Krystyna Hutchinson
Searching for Stars on an Island in Maine Alan Lightman
Wide Sargasso Sea Jean Rhys
Infinite Jest David Foster Wallace
A Room of One’s Own Virginia Woolf
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