The inquisitive one was sitting with a group of friends who had gathered to read books together. Some of the friends were old, some were new, some were happy, and some were blue. And one of them was starting to get red in the face. This was a new friend, who had forgotten to bring a book with her.

“Oh no,” she said. “This is embarrassing. Reading silently amidst friends is not going to be very fun without a book.”

“That’s okay, because I brought two books with me,” said the inquisitive one. “I was going to read this red one. Do you want to borrow this blue one?”

“Oh, yes, thank you!” said the new friend.

Soon after that, the group of friends read silently together. When they had stopped reading, the inquisitive one spoke up:

“I’m really enjoying this red book! How do you like that blue book?”

“Oh, this blue book is so good!” exclaimed the new friend. “In fact, this blue book is amazing. I am enjoying it so much. I hate to give it back to you!”

“You can borrow it!” said the inquisitive one. “Just come read with us again and return it to me. I received it as a birthday present and am very excited to read it, as I have never read that one before; but you can read it first.”

“Oh, thank you. You are so kind!” said the new friend.

And when the group of friends parted, the new friend took the blue book with her.

Many months passed, during which the inquisitive one saw no sign or trace of the new friend or the blue book. The inquisitive one thought often of that blue book. It was a trade paperback. Its cover was pristine and the color of the deep sea. Its pages lay flat and crisply together. It was a twentieth-century masterpiece known for its beautiful language and harrowing subject matter. It seemed like the type of book one could fall into and have trouble escaping from.

Alternate Ending #1

The new friend carried the blue book with her everywhere she went. She read a few pages every day. She read in the pool as the grandkids splashed beside her, and she read while walking through a morning mist that turned to drizzle. She read while drinking coffee and accidentally spilling it, and she read while eating those deliciously crumbly butter cookies, the kind that you should never eat in bed unless it’s laundry day and you have not yet done the sheets. She read while riding a Ferris wheel with the grandkids, and she accidentally dropped it while at the highest point. (She had to ask the attendants to retrieve it from the thorny bushes where it had fallen.) She read in the kitchen as her boyfriend cut up a pomegranate and then chopped up some beets, using a macho knife with maximum flourishes and pizza-dough-like tosses for effect. She folded down many of the pages, and she took copious notes in the margins. She tore out the least interesting pages, to teach the grandkids how to make origami cranes.

And finally, after months of reading, she finished the book!

Sometime after that, the new friend showed up at a meeting of the group of friends and handed the blue book to the inquisitive one.

“It was really good,” she said. “Thank you!”

The inquisitive one stared at the book in disbelief.

The inquisitive one opened the mouth, but nothing came out.

“But listen,” said the friend, “I actually ended up with two of these. Would you like this one instead?” And she slid a brand new copy of the book from her purse.

“Oh, haha, sure!” said the inquisitive one, in joy and relief.

And they had a long talk about the grandkids over two glasses of very red wine.

Alternate Ending #2

Unbeknownst to the inquisitive one and the new friend, the spine of the blue book was infested with microscopic worms. As the new friend was reading the book, some of the microscopic worms inched their way up her arms and into her ears. They began feeding on the new friend’s brain cells. The new friend soon lost the memory of ever having gone to the reading group.

“Where did I get this book?” she wondered, while pouring boiling water into the flowerpot instead of her mug.

“What happened at the beginning of this book?” she wondered later on, while reading the book on a Metro train that was quickly moving farther away from her intended destination.

“What is a book?” she wondered even later on, while wandering through a bookstore, looking for the dairy section.

The new friend took very good care of the blue book, but sadly never finished it.

Alternate Ending #3

The new friend finished the blue book within 24 hours. It was that good! Indeed, it was such a powerful novel that it changed the new friend’s life forever. The new friend realized, through the reading of the book, that major life changes must be made, and must be made right now. The new friend had several epiphanies, all prompted by the blue book, within those 24 hours, one of which was that she was living in the wrong country and engaging in the wrong activities. So she packed up the suitcases, grandkids, and boyfriend, and moved to Tonga in the South Pacific. Once there, she enrolled in college courses in real estate law, and signed up for lessons in snowboarding.

The new friend was so engrossed in all of this life upheaval that she was unable to make it back to the reading group in the Washington, D.C., area. Instead, she put a note in a bottle thanking the inquisitive one for introducing her to such a wonderful and powerful and truly life-changing book. She set the bottle off to sea, confident that it would have its own special adventures, too.

Alternate Ending #4

Many months after attending the reading group, the new friend showed up at the reading group again.

“Hi, do you remember me? Here’s your book back,” said the new friend to the inquisitive one. The inquisitive one took the gently used and obviously well-taken-care-of book from her hands, delighted to see that beautiful blue cover again.

“Hi, thanks so much!” said the inquisitive one.

“Sorry I haven’t come to the reading group until now. I finished it long ago, but I got so busy with the grandkids and everything else. I have been meaning to come and return the book to you.”

“It’s okay, no worries! Was it a good book?”

“It started out great! But the ending was kind of blah. Nothing really happened. It just seemed like ordinary life, nothing very exciting or interesting, you know?”

“Oh, that’s too bad,” said the inquisitive one.

“It made me wonder, couldn’t the author have written something more entertaining? Why am I reading this? This is putting me to sleep, and it’s not even teaching me anything, either.”

“Oh, that’s too bad,” said the inquisitive one.

And then they started talking about the new friend’s grandkids.

Their personalities didn’t mesh, and the conversation was somewhat awkward.

Scenarios

1. One day my loved one announced a new household order. I am no longer allowed to drive, talk to anyone except my loved one, seek medical care, spend money without permission, or use electricity. I am only permitted to wear traditional clothing; I am only permitted to read books approved by my loved one. This feels restrictive and wrong. I am not used to this. On the other hand, I love and respect my loved one, and we have kids together. Should I say something to my loved one? Should I say something to someone else? Should I simply do as I am told?

4. One day I overheard my loved ones talking. They don’t like other members of the family, who are not present in this room. They have hatched a horrific plan, which may result in harm to those loved ones. Luckily, the plan has been preapproved, and in fact commanded, by a supremely divine force—the most important force in existence, certainly more wise and powerful than I am! Despite my love and adoration of my god, however, I am worried about those other family members. Should I say something to my loved ones who have hatched this horrific plan? Should I say something to my family members who may be in danger? Should I say something to someone else? Or should I simply talk to my god, leaving it in the hands of this all-knowing and supremely divine force?

Book

The above are real scenarios faced by real people. All are described in the book Under the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer. Some of the people chose to say something. Others chose not to.

Outcomes

1. In the 1980s, Dan Lafferty imposed new household rules on his wife Matilda. She despised the rules, but ultimately accepted them, fearful that she would lose her children if she did not. Dan shared his beliefs and experiences with his brothers. Krakauer explains what happened next: “When three of Dan’s brothers attempted to impose these principles in their own homes, however, their wives refused and began to complain.”

2. In the 1830s, Joseph Smith, the founder of Mormonism, began to take plural wives. His first wife, Emma, was not okay with this. As Krakauer explains, “Outspoken by nature, Emma despised polygamy and did not hesitate to make her views known to the prophet. At one point she even threatened to take a plural husband if he didn’t give up his plural wives.”

3. This is the famous story of Elizabeth Smart, who is now an advocate, author, and public speaker. When she was 14 and in a horrific situation, she was terrified to speak out. Fortunately, she found the strength and courage to tell the police the truth after 45 minutes of questioning.

4. Under the Banner of Heaven tells the story of the 1984 murders of the wife and daughter of one of Dan’s brothers. Astonishingly, several people knew about the plot but did not share this information with another living human being. The above scenario is a composite of two people who did not tell: the husband and father; and the mother-in-law and grandmother. Another person who did not tell was a friend and associate of the brothers.

Verdict

Speaking out against people with power and influence is not an easy thing to do. I know how it feels to be paralyzed by fear. I also know how it feels to walk through the fear to the other side: how it feels to confront someone face to face and tell the truth. It’s terrifying. But it’s worth it, for the sake of people’s mental and physical health, and for the sake of a better future.

We might, as a mnemonic device, modify the very good and helpful U.S. security slogan, If You See Something, Say Something. How about this for a personal slogan? If You Hear Something, Say Something. When in doubt, it seems like a good policy to at least talk the situation over with some trusted friends. It’s hard sometimes to see a situation objectively on your own. An outside perspective or two can work wonders. And perhaps even prevent tragedies.

Does someone close to you have an idea that makes you feel uncomfortable? Have you thought to yourself, “Should I say something?” Have you said something? Will you say something?

Welcome to Utah

I just learned that the state slogan of Utah is Life Elevated. How ingenious is that?! I am a big fan of double meanings, and this one takes the cake. The whole five-layered, elaborately sculpted, thickly frosted, sugary-as-hell cake. What a great motto!

Utah is famous, of course, for its elevation: both physical and metaphysical. The state’s mountains, and the sporty adventures one can have on and among them, are legendary. Equally legendary is its people’s unique mix of religious beliefs.

Jon Krakauer, Writer Extraordinaire

One of my favorite writers, Jon Krakauer, is famous for writing about life on elevated levels: both physical and metaphysical. He’s a mountain climber who writes about mountain climbing. His writings also focus on extreme adventure in forested regions, deserts, and other wilderness areas far remote from cities and towns. Furthermore, his reporting is so detailed and comprehensive that the writing ascends to the level of philosophy. And yet the writing is not difficult to understand, but instead, intensely and compulsively readable. He likes to write about people whose life philosophies are so rarefied that they stray into mortal danger. To read a book by him is to attempt to enter into a unique mindset, to follow unorthodox ideas to their logical conclusions, to seek out an elevated height, and to descend into tragedy.

That was my experience, anyway, in reading two phenomenal books by him. It was also my experience when, more recently, I took on a third.

Nonfiction Elevated

Into the Wild (1996) is the true story of a young man’s tragic journey into the American West and, ultimately, the wilderness of Alaska. A young man attempts to escape from the confines of society, only to be trapped by the confines of nature. Krakauer also weaves in memories of himself as a young man, who sought to escape the “real world” of society by entering the “realer world” of dangerous mountain climbing. The book offers a unique look into two young men’s minds and adventures: the subject’s and the author’s.

Into Thin Air (1997) is the true story of mountain climbers who paid experienced guides to take them to the top of Mount Everest. Things went horribly wrong, and a number of people, including several guides, lost their lives; others lost body parts due to frostbite. Krakauer was himself one of the climbers; he was there as a reporter. He barely made it out alive. The story is shocking and well told; I could not put it down. It delves into many philosophical realms, as the author tackles big issues, such as these:

• The extent of the responsibility of guides to help other climbers (Does it end and, if so, where?)
• The adventure tourism industry (Is it mainly beneficial, or mainly destructive?)
• The nature of reporting and its inevitable effects on its subjects (Big moral questions here)
• The nature of risk taking (Do people understand the risks they take? Does it matter?)

I could not recommend these books more highly. A+. Perfect 10. If you are interested in human nature and extreme life situations, check them out. Just prepare yourself for a wild and stomach-churning ride.

Murder in Mormondom

It is fitting that Krakauer would next turn his attention to an unusual case of murder in the state of Utah: where life is elevated. In Under the Banner of Heaven (2003), he writes about a group of brothers’ separation from society and adoption of a rigidly fundamentalist life philosophy. He also tells the story of the founding of Mormonism by Joseph Smith, and how the new religion split into different groups of believers, some of them fundamentalists who practice polygamy. And he tries to piece together how these diverse circumstances might or might not relate to the 1984 murder of the wife and daughter of one of the brothers, by another of the brothers.

As Krakauer explains, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (a.k.a. the Mormon church) is a uniquely interesting religion to study. Other world religions, he points out, “enjoy the considerable advantage of having made their public debut in the shadowy recesses of the ancient past. . . . Unlike Moses, Jesus, Muhammad, and Buddha, Joseph was a modern prophet who lived in the brightly lit age of the affidavit and the printing press.”

This, he explains, “allows fascinating insights into what makes a religious genius tick.” His book offers these insights, for sure. It also offers insights into what makes the murderer of his story tick—and what, if anything, this has to do with religion and fundamentalism.

Elevation and Philosophy

Are you a risk taker? A believer? A mountain climber? A recluse? A thrill seeker? A journeyer to the wild beyond? A guide to the wilderness? A go-getter? A guide to the holiness beyond?

How do you, with your fervently held beliefs and penchant for adventure, keep yourself from falling off a (physical or metaphorical) cliff?

Lest you think I’ve abandoned writing about books in favor of writing about travel, let’s talk books today. My next blog post will preview a book about America—promise! But today, let’s linger overseas. Let me first tell you about a famous English-language bookstore in Paris called Shakespeare and Company. It’s located across the street from Notre Dame, it has an exquisite selection of books (in English!), and it has a motto to live by (see the photo). And let me now tell you about a book I read about Paris, before traveling to Paris.

Book Club Fiction and Women’s Fiction

Paris by the Book, a recently published novel by Liam Callanan, was given to me as a gift by a family member, upon my sharing that I was planning a trip to said city. Although it’s not the type of book I usually read, I read it before my trip and thereby learned a few facts about the city, and picked up a few additional French words. Paris by the Book is what publishing professionals call “book club fiction” or “women’s fiction.” These labels don’t mean that the book can’t be read outside of book clubs or by men. They merely mean that the book is well suited to be read in women’s book clubs . . . which are a huge source of revenue for the publishing industry.

In such books, there is often a relatable female heroine. And such books often raise issues that pertain to modern women’s lives, without being too inflammatory: issues easily discussable over wine and cheese in someone’s stylish living room. Often, the reader doesn’t need a lot of background knowledge to understand the book, or too much grit to make it through the entire thing; in other words, such books are accessible to a wide audience.

Literary agents with whom I’ve had contact seem to wish that my books were in the “book club fiction” category and/or “women’s fiction” category. Such books sell like hotcakes. When one women reads one, all the women in her circle have to read it, too.

Paris by the Book is indeed an easy read. There is indeed a relatable female heroine. (She is an American woman with two daughters; they all end up traveling to and living in Paris.) And indeed, the book raises issues pertaining to modern women’s lives.

Yeah, I’m a Woman

In fact, the book seemed so relevant to my own life that, upon reaching a certain point, I had a strong reaction. Anger. I was so angry! At a character in the book, yes, but also at people in my real social circles. I had trouble sleeping one night, I was so angry. And upon finishing the book, I immediately gave it to a female friend to read, because I’m eager to discuss it with another woman.

Book club fiction? Women’s fiction? Spot on. And, as my Airbnb host in London said to me, upon my confession that I could not stop crying while watching the play Emilia, “If it provokes an emotional reaction, it must be doing something right.” (I describe the play and my reaction to it here.)

Art’s Purpose

And that’s what art is all about! If I’m reacting, a connection was made. True, other people might react completely differently, or not at all, to the same work. However, if the artwork is making a connection with at least a substantial proportion of its audience, it’s doing its job. It’s expressing something in a format that other humans can understand. It’s communication in the emotional sphere.

Paris by the Book is far from perfect. I agree with the critique of it in this excellent review. But a certain key aspect of the book caused me to react, and this prompted me to think. Why am I so upset about this? wondered I. And I learned something about myself, and others, as a result.

When was the last time you had a strong emotional reaction to a work of art—such as a novel, play, or visual piece? Did you learn something about yourself, or others, as a result?

In full disclosure: Paris and I didn’t groove together as well as London and I did. My trip to London was a dream, from start to finish. Paris, however, was a struggle. This was partly due to the fact that I had already been traveling for nine days by the time I got to Paris, and I was getting tired. This was also due to the language barrier, which caused my stay to feel more like an intensely difficult challenge than a carefree vacation. But the most important reason why Paris was a struggle for me was that . . . I had wardrobe issues. And so, without further ado, let’s discuss what to wear in Paris, as well as what not to wear, in case you wish to pack a suitcase more appropriately than I did, before traveling to the famously stylish capital of France.

Do wear traditional Parisian styles and colors.

I saw a lot of stripes in Paris. There were a lot of black and white stripes. And navy blue and white stripes. There was also a lot of solid red. And there were a lot of berets. It’s perfectly okay to wear stereotypically Parisian attire in Paris!

For example, here’s a woman in red and white stripes, exiting the famous cafe Les Deux Magots:

Hemingway and other famous writers used to hang out at this cafe. I had intended to hang out at this cafe, as well; but as you can see, it was very crowded when I was there. So I went elsewhere. Guess I’m not as cool as Hemingway. But back to clothing. I noticed that, for men, funky hats and colorful shoes are in. Check out the dude in the crosswalk with a white hat and neon green shoes.

And did you notice the young woman in full-on traditional Parisian attire in the crowd before the Mona Lisa, in my first blog post about the Louvre? Here’s a detail of the photo. I did not notice her until after I got home and looked at my photos, so it’s not like she stood out to me as bizarrely dressed. On the contrary—she fit right in.

It’s also okay to add modern flair to traditional fashions. Check out the dude in red and black walking past the Notre Dame cathedral in the first photo (at the beginning of this blog post). Now here’s a fellow who knows how to go traditional, but with a modern flair. And note that he, also, is wearing a funky hat and colorful shoes.

Do be fashionable and stylish.

I shared this photo earlier, in my blog post about migraines and other health issues. I wish you could see more clearly how well dressed this young couple was—the two whose heads are leaning romantically toward each other. I was in awe, particularly of the woman. She had short hair, styled chicly, as you can perhaps see here. She was wearing a dress that had two thick, long, black, vertical stripes from collar to the hem at her knees. And her fabulous shoes had heels, but also a hardcore, stabilizing thickness to them—which was a good thing, as she needed to stand on them for hours at this concert.

Later, I was near this piece of outdoor wall art—one of those works that’s easier to read when you step back—when I met another fashionably well-dressed person. He looked like he had walked right out of the 60s. But he also looked very modern. I loved the jazzy hat, the double-lapelled jacket, the stylish shoes. He turned out to be, like me, a lost American. Luckily, I had just found where he was trying to go, and he then found where I was trying to go. He was in a hurry, so we exchanged numbers, and after a series of comical mishaps, met up for drinks very late that night. Kudos to him for knowing how to dress in Paris to impress a woman! And we parted friends (and nothing more; no one freak out).

Do go au naturel . . . depending on who you are.

I visited the famous Paris Opera House, known as Palais Garnier, on my first evening in the city. Here’s a shot of the appropriately majestic exterior, with a bus photobombing the scene just to remind us what century we’re in. Thus I fulfilled my original inspiration for traveling to Paris, which I explained in this earlier post.

The interior was equally majestic, with a colorful ceiling fresco painted by Marc Chagall. This photo does not do justice to the massiveness of the chandelier. I would not want to be under it if it fell!

So what does this have to do with what to wear in Paris? At the opera house, I saw an excellent ballet. I especially enjoyed the first dance, set to music by the great Philip Glass (the second movement of Symphony No. 2); Sol León and Paul Lightfoot were the choreographers and set/costume designers. Two of the many dancers were stationary on extremely tall stilts, except for their arms, which danced at key intervals to the music. It was a very interesting performance. It got even more interesting when, halfway through, one of those two tall dancers, the female one, dropped her shirt and performed the remainder of the dance topless.

This was was my first night in Paris. Welcome to France, Liza!!

However, I did not see any other topless ladies in Paris. Unless, of course, you count the lovely Venus de Milo and other statues, such as this impressive collection in a cafe window:

 
So I don’t necessarily recommend going the au naturel route. It is a good idea to pack a suitcase before traveling to Paris. With clothes in it.

Do wear swan feathers . . . if you are a swan.

Check out this elegant Parisian look:

 
This fashionable style merits a closeup of the models on the runway . . . er, swimway:

 

This idea is for daring, fashion-forward types only.

These cottonlike seeds were falling from trees all over Paris when I was there. They were wafting through the open doors of cafes and collecting in clumps on the ground. At times, I found it difficult to eat a meal and enjoy a view in peace, for these kept falling into my food and face.

Are these from cottonwood trees? I have no idea. But perhaps Lady Gaga, or someone else on the cutting edge of fashion, might hire someone to make a dress out of these for their next red-carpet appearance. Just a suggestion.

Don’t wear uncomfortable shoes.

So there I was, sitting at a cafe called The New York, which was, oddly, the only cafe I could find at this particular location, across the Seine River from the Eiffel Tower. So I ordered some New York cheesecake (“When in Rome . . .”) and a glass of wine, and sat back to enjoy the view.

The view was obstructed, but it was still a very good view. So I snapped a photo. Those cottonlike seeds were everywhere, so I turned around in my seat and snapped the photo above.

And then I snapped a photo of my little reminder of home (the napkin and cheesecake), my little reminder of Paris (the wine), and my little reminder that fashion and style are not—contrary to popular belief!—the most important things to consider, when packing a suitcase to travel to Paris.
You see, In London, my shoes broke. I found a shoe store and bought a new pair. These were sensible flats with style. Of course, walking around all day, for days on end, in new, unbroken-in shoes is never a good idea. By the time I got to Paris, I had developed a massive blister on my foot. I bought some foot pads at a pharmacy, which helped with my comfort while walking. But the blister remained stubbornly alive . . . and kept growing.

After a couple miserable days, I transferred my new foot pads to my running shoes and started walking around Paris in comfort. Duh—why did I not do that sooner?

I confess, I have shoe issues. Like many (dare I say most?) women, I love fashionable shoes. But even more, I love running. And walking. And gardening. And strolling through London and Paris and Washington, D.C. Time and again, my cute shoes let me down. Time and again, I revert to my trusty running shoes . . . and then get bored of the sporty look and long to switch things up in favor of the stylish look . . . and feel lucky one day . . . and try the cute shoes again . . . and it’s a terrible, vicious circle.

I keep telling myself that, one of these days, I’m going to give up on fashion and start wearing running shoes everywhere I go. That would be fine for Paris, but I’m not sure how that would go over at my next work conference. . . .

TL;DR

You’re wondering what to wear in Paris? Here’s a quick-glance guide:

1. Wear comfortable shoes. That way, you can walk around all day and enjoy the world-class architecture, museums, gardens, and more.
2. Bonus points if you dress stylishly.
3. Triple bonus points if you manage to do both 1 and 2 at once! (And if you do, or have suggestions for managing this perennial dilemma, let me know your thoughts!)