I

In a play I saw recently, the heroine first appears onstage wearing a red dress . . . with her head bowed and turned away, due to social anxiety. The contrast is striking. There’s something about a red dress that shouts, “Look at me!” To see one on a young woman who so plainly wants to be invisible is painful.

II

Why is it so obvious that “the lady in red” (from Chris de Burgh’s 1986 hit song) projects confidence on the dance floor—even though the lyrics say nothing about how she carries herself?

III

“She caught a glimpse of herself in a glass . . . and wished that she had not worn red.”

—from The Bookshop by Penelope Fitzgerald

This passage is from a scene in which the shy protagonist attends a fancy party.

She has recently decided to open a bookshop in a small, rural, and insular town by the sea. The people do not think their town has any particular need for a bookshop. They think that a townsperson—particularly a woman—who would open a bookshop must be uncommonly bold.

The woman herself does not feel or act bold, while wearing her red dress.

IV

Q: Should I wear this red dress to the party?
A: No.

Q: It’s a costume party.
A: Oh, then that’s all right.

Q: Kidding, it’s a normal party. But I spent a lot of money on this dress. It would be a shame not to wear it. It looked fabulous on me in the fitting room!
A: Are you a model, or do you play one on TV?

Q: No.
A: Then no.

Q: I’ve decided to wear the red dress! What’s the best way to wear it: with what jewelry; with hosiery or without; with which shoes?
A: Confidently.

Q: Are you sure about all this?
A: Since I happen to be wearing a red dress right now, I’m going to say YES!

V

Would a lady in blue need as much confidence as “the lady in red” has, to pull off the scene described in the 1986 hit song?

VI

“‘Why are you wearing red this evening?’ he asked.
“‘It isn’t red! It’s garnet, or deep rust!'”

—from The Bookshop by Penelope Fitzgerald

Where did I hear of Penelope Fitzgerald? I can’t remember, but I believe I read about her recently.

It’s a subtle feeling, one I can’t substantiate. I could, I suppose, spend hours paging through my precarious stacks of magazines. There’s also the finger-snapping quickness of the Internet—which informs me that some 30 New Yorker articles in the past couple decades have made mention of her. None of these, however, jog my memory.

Perhaps this is fitting, as Penelope Fitzgerald is a writer of subtlety, who has herself, as an author, tended to fly under the radar. But she’s far from an unknown: even, apparently, to me. So when I was recently browsing through a little bookshop, and noticed a little book called The Bookshop by Penelope Fitzgerald—I snatched it up.

The Bookshop is about an unassuming woman who opens up a bookshop in a remote corner of England. The novel was shortlisted for the Booker Prize, and rightly so. The following passage, which ends a chapter, is a good example of the subtlety of Fitzgerald’s writing:

“She herself was going to take the ferry across the Laze, as it was early-closing day, to deliver thirty Complete Wild Flower Recognition Handbooks to the Women’s Institute. Remembering this, she took the top book off the crisp pile and looked through the illustrations for the green marsh plant which Raven had shown to her. It was not mentioned.”

Ah! So delicate, this passage. But why was the green marsh plant—the one plant, of all the plants on earth, most meaningful to the protagonist, as it was shown to her by a true friend, of which she had very few—not mentioned in the “complete” guide?

Perhaps the green marsh plant was not scientifically classified as a wildflower. Or perhaps the plant’s omission from the book was an error. But this is beside the point. The point is more filamentary. It has to do with the overlooked, the missing, the forgotten phenomena of the world.

What, after all, is the value of minute remembrance? What is the value of the overlooked, all those who are ignored by the public at large? What, indeed, is the value of books and magazines, when they never seem to contain what you’re really looking for?

The inquisitive one noticed someone cute on the dating site. They went on not one, but two dates!

On the first date, they met at a Greek restaurant. They had so much fun talking at the restaurant that they decided to go out for coffee afterward. A while later, they hugged good night and made jokes as they waved goodbye!

On the second date, they met at an art museum. They had so much fun looking at paintings that they decided to get dinner at a quaint little restaurant. They had so much fun talking at the restaurant that they decided to browse through a bookstore. They had so much fun looking at books that they decided to get tea and pastries at a café. A while later, they kissed good night, waved goodbye, and texted each other jokes!

Two days later, the inquisitive one sent two cheerful texts to the date!

A few hours after that, the date touched the icon of the texting app to send a message. But suddenly, just at that moment, the date’s soul flew out of the date’s body!

The date’s soul could no longer manipulate the date’s body!

The date was now, completely irrevocably, a phantom!

And for many months afterward, the date’s poor soul flitted about ancient buildings and graveyards, ruminating in agony over what had happened so suddenly and inexplicably.

This is the terrifying modern epidemic known as ghosting. I hope it never happens to you!

I’m excited to announce the second contest of this blog! Enter by 11:59 p.m. on Friday, March 15 to win exciting prizes!

As many of you know, I have spent the past 15 years writing, editing, and polishing two books, and I’d love to get them published. But I need your help. One of the best ways you can help me realize my dream is by sharing my writing with your friends. I appreciate your support, and I hope you find my blog and other writings enjoyable, interesting, and informative. Will you help me spread the word? I would be very much honored to receive your help.

To enter the contest, simply have your friends subscribe to the newsletter, and then fill out this form.

If You Refer 1 Friend:

You will receive an advance copy of my upcoming article “Books to Read Before You Die”—months before it is made available to the public!

If You Refer 2 Friends:

You will receive the prize for referring 1 friend, PLUS a coupon to Bards Alley, an indie bookstore and wine bar in Vienna, Virginia. This is one of my favorite places in the D.C. area. If you haven’t been there, it’s definitely worth checking out. Their selection of books is impeccable, and the atmosphere is peaceful, quaint, and fun. Save money while supporting an independent bookseller!

If You Refer 3 Friends:

You will receive the prize for referring 1 friend and the prize for referring 2 friends, PLUS you will be featured in an upcoming story about the inquisitive one!*

Official Contest Rules

1. The contest starts now—Friday, March 1, 2019, at 8:00am EST (UTC−05:00)—and ends on Friday, March 15, 2019, at 11:59pm EDT (UTC−04:00). Your friend(s) must subscribe to the newsletter during this time period. You must also enter the contest during this time period. Subscriptions and entries outside of this time period will not count toward the contest. The exact time for purposes of this contest is determined by the timestamp on this website.
2. Subscribing to the newsletter is a two-step process. First, your friend(s) must fill in the form on the Subscribe to the Newsletter page. Second, they must confirm their subscription by clicking the link in the email they will receive. Only if your friend(s) complete both steps will your contest entry count.
3. Yes, you can refer yourself! However, this only applies to those not already subscribed. You may not unsubscribe and then resubscribe for a contest entry (c’mon, really?!).
4. Your friend(s) may also not unsubscribe and then resubscribe for your contest entry (people, let’s be serious!!).
5. It’s okay to refer a “friend” who is not strictly your friend—for example, your significant other, family member, neighbor, dental hygienist, seatmate on the train, worst enemy, etc.
6. I, Liza Achilles, will be the sole judge as to which entries are counted and which prizes are awarded. Failure to comply with the rules, as judged by me, will result in disqualification.

How to Enter the Contest

First, tell your friends to visit https://lizaachilles.com/newsletter/, fill in the form, and confirm their subscription by clicking the link in an email they will receive.

Second, enter the contest here.

Good luck, and thanks again for your support!

*Props and thanks to the peerless J.B. for coming up with this idea.

There was some kind of trouble with the horses.

I knew this because part one of the novel is called “Trouble with the Horses.” Indeed, by the time I had finished reading the first two pages, I had learned quite a lot—considering the limited number of words there—about certain troubles involving certain horses. And then, to underscore what I had learned, the narrator of The Sisters Brothers ends his initial, little, two-page section by informing me, “This was the trouble with the horses.”

I had to admit—the situation RE the horses did seem troublesome. And in more ways than one.

But so as not to spoil the read for you, let’s talk more generally about The Sisters Brothers. What a delightful title, for a delightful novel, with a delightful cover!

The title refers to the two main characters: brothers whose last name is Sisters. Ha!

The novel is a literary Western. It’s set in 1851, in Oregon Territory and California, during the gold rush; but this is no ordinary shoot-’em-up. It’s too quirky, too comical, too ironic, and too sweet. Ha!

The cover of my paperback copy shows a daguerreotype, circa 1852, titled Portrait of two young men. The two are wearing the old-fashioned suits and hats of the era and holding weapons and glasses of hard liquor. It’s a stunning image, but its most interesting feature is the blood-stained bullet hole in one of the young men’s vests. The Wild West, indeed. Ha!

Though it’s a stunning and historically authentic cover, the image doesn’t match the descriptions of the characters in the book. But that’s all right with me. What sits less well with me is the sticker.

Upon pulling the book from the bookstore shelf, I noticed a circular sticker on the cover that read “SOON TO BE A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE.” This, from my irredeemably literary perspective, was something of a turn-off. However, I persevered in buying the book, since I had read good things about it and its author, Patrick deWitt.

Upon arriving home, I peeled off the sticker: and, lo and behold, guess what was underneath? A circular icon that read “SHORTLISTED for the MAN BOOKER PRIZE.” Whoa—now we’re talking! That’s my favorite literary award! The book would have been a shoo-in for my cart (that is, my arms), had it been visible. But such is our world, that the preferred advertisement for a book is not its recognition by a highly regarded literary award, but its transformation into a new work, in another art form, that may well turn out to be so different from the original as to hardly merit the same title.

That being said, the reading experience was cinematic. It is a book that is eminently worthy, in my opinion, of both prestigious awards and Hollywood.

Have you had any trouble with horses lately?